Timing: am I Ready?

Me, Cadence, Elaine, Legoland, November 2010

Crucial and Unpredictable

Have you noticed how critical timing can be? Sometimes, though, it's hard to determine the best time to launch a project, say, or take a trip. Events don't always unfold as we expect them to.

I needed to call customer service at a large internet-based company. Several weeks earlier, I'd sent email regarding a problem with my account; after several exchanges, the representative had advised me to phone in for assistance. I'd been putting off the call in the expectation that it would be drawn out and unpleasant.

Friday morning at five-thirty I decided to tackle the dreaded task. I called the toll-free number. After navigating the auto-attendant, I heard a message asking that I "hold for the next available agent." I pressed the speaker button on my phone and returned the receiver to its cradle. 86 minutes later, I'd listened to a lot of mediocre music and a periodic recording asking me to continue to wait. I finally abandoned the task, as I had to prepare for work.

Saturday morning at six I called again. Once again a recorded voice asked me to hold. But about 15 seconds later, a live human voice offered assistance. The agent was courteous and competent; within just a few minutes my problem was resolved.

I'd expected to listen to canned music and recordings for hours. Instead I had to scramble to retrieve the information I needed to provide to the representative. In fact, I'd been about to walk away from my desk and pour another cup of coffee when the agent came on the line.

I could not have predicted that early Saturday morning would be the "right time," but it was.

God is like that. His timing is mysterious to me. So I try to be ready. And I trust.

35 "Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will not pass away.

36 "But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father alone.
37 "For the coming of the Son of Man will be just like the days of Noah.
38 "For as in those days before the flood they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noah entered the ark,
39  and they did not understand until the flood came and took them all away; so will the coming of the Son of Man be.
Matthew 24:35-39 (NASB)

 

Whose Donkeys are Suffering?

Grandson Ayden and I Visiting Annie, Who is Not a Donkey, 2007

Fooling Myself

Sometimes when I read my bible, a verse jumps off the page and grabs my heart. I try to attend to these specific bits of scripture that draw me in, asking myself, "What does God want me to get out of this passage?"

Sometimes it's obvious. Sometimes it's not.

Since reading it a  few days ago, I find myself circling back, inexplicably, to this verse:

5 If you see that the donkey of someone who hates you has collapsed under its load, do not walk by. Instead, stop and help.

Exodus 23:5 (NLT)

I ponder this verse and come up stumped--partly, I suppose, because I misread the verse, mentally rendering it  as "If you see that the donkey of someone you hate has collapsed..." I'm not willing to recognize that I hate anyone, so I couldn't make this fit personally.

Is that the lesson God wants me to learn, I wondered? Am I harboring ill will that I don't acknowledge?

Last night I awoke in the middle of the night with this verse on my mind.

This morning I returned to the engaging verse, only to discover my error. So I'll think about it more. It's easy for me to imagine that someone hates me, though no specific names come to mind.

While considering the verse as I misread it, I could think of several examples that "fit" on a social level, rather than within my own heart. Consider the persistent problem of poverty in the United States. On one side we have people holding up a lack of personal responsibility as the ultimate culprit. On the other side we have people pointing to our obligation to help our less-fortunate neighbors. And while ideologues battle it out, children go hungry. Children sleep in cars. Children don't receive medical care.

"Donkeys" are suffering.

I'm tempted to accept this reflection as the meaning in the message.

I'm resisting that temptation. I'll keep thinking about the lessons this verse holds for me.

When God points me to a specific bit of His word and wakes me at night to consider it, the least I can do is pay attention, listen to Him, and think.

4 I call to you, to all of you!

I raise my voice to all people.
5 You simple people, use good judgment.
You foolish people, show some understanding.
6 Listen to me! For I have important things to tell you.
Everything I say is right,
7 for I speak the truth
and detest every kind of deception.
Proverbs 8:4-7 (NLT)

Snowbound Worries

Snow. Photo by Bob Coller.

My friend Bob graciously granted me permission to share this amazing photograph with you.

Itching and Inspiration

Last night when my husband Rich and I prayed at bedtime, he asked God to make it clear to me what He would have me write about this morning. I am here to tell you that the Lord does indeed move in mysterious ways!

I've been coping for the past few weeks with an outbreak of hives, a rare occurrence in my life. As I lay in bed last night I could feel spots of heat forming on my skin and I knew the painful itching would soon follow. I prayed silently, asking for relief. After lying in bed for an hour, I arose, came downstairs, took an antihistamine and poured myself a nightcap.

To pass the time while I waited for the itching to subside, I logged on to Facebook. My friend Bob Coller was also online; he and I enjoyed an exchange that included this snippet:

Bob:  in Michigan we've given up on washing our salt/snow/ice covered cares... we just let them rust! (but we keep our Whalers clean!)

Me:  I think "snow covered cares" is the best.typo.ever.

Bob:  ok... that might have been "cars"... what's an e among friends?

Me: I'm loving the image. Think about it. All your cares, frozen. Stuck. Shivering, even.

Bob: those of us in Michigan are not loving the "shivering" stuff!

Me: I bet!! But picture your cares--your worries--encased in ice, shut out in the cold, shivering....

Bob: Sheila... I sense a blog post... need some photos of snow? :)

Bob and I didn't start our online "conversation" talking about cold and snow and worries. It began with a discussion of the utility of Google applications and some whimsical thoughts about what might come next-- Google Laundry, anyone?

I sat at my computer and imagined freezing my hives. I pictured an aerosol can filled with liquid nitrogen. Mentally I turned my can of nitrogen on the pressing deadlines at work. Next I took aim at the financial challenges that always accompany the first months of the new year. The images that resulted nearly made me laugh out loud--these cares, frozen, brittle--I could smash them into bits with a sledgehammer!--incapacitated.

I realized that my prayers had been answered. The itching was muted to a level that would admit sleep into my night, and I knew what to share with you today.

Sometimes God answers our prayers by saying, "well, go downstairs and take an antihistamine!" Sometimes He speaks to us through our friends.

Or their keyboards.

Either way, I'm now picturing a label on my big can of liquid nitrogen. It reads, "Prayer."

6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. 8 Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. 9 The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.

Philippians 4:6-9 (NASB)

 

Don't Blame Beethoven!

Cadence and his Bongos at Pep Band, 2008

Lord, Protect me from your Followers

Last month my husband Rich and I had the good fortune to hear Philip Yancey speak. I enjoy his books because he's not afraid to tackle tough questions about our faith; he carries that same courage to his appearances, I was happy to discover.

One of his points, phrased more eloquently than I could hope to, has been roaming my mind ever since. Speaking of people who turn away from their faith because of unfortunate choices made by others who proclaim to be Christians, he told the story of hearing a professional symphony in Chicago play Beethoven's Symphony No. 5; years later he listened as a high school orchestra bravely tackled that same score. He concluded that the two performances varied greatly in their faithfulness to Beethoven's magnificent score; obviously it had been a joy to listen to the symphony in Chicago, while the high school orchestra's rendition was a bit, well....rough.

As a follower of Christ, and a former student violinist, who winces when the news announces that some church plans to burn the holy texts of another faith, or that members of a church are planning to disrupt a funeral by protesting--let alone the historic horrors that have been committed in the name of Christianity--Yancey's words resonated with me.

I remembered a particularly tortured rendition of Handel's Hallelujah Chorus that I helped to perpetrate in eighth grade. And I shuddered again, all these years later.

Last summer, famed author Anne Rice announced that she was leaving Christianity. A day or two later, she offered this clarifying comment:

My conversion from a pessimistic atheist lost in a world I didn't understand to an optimistic believer in a universe created and sustained by a loving God is crucial to me. But following Christ does not mean following His followers. Christ is infinitely more important than Christianity and always will be, no matter what Christianity is, has been, or might become.

I've been thinking a lot about Mr. Yancey's words, and Ms. Rice's words, and Handel's Hallelujah Chorus.
I remember that in tenth grade, I had another opportunity to perform the piece with another student orchestra. While still far from perfect, our faithfulness to the score was better than it had been two years earlier. I'd studied the score more and I came closer to reproducing it as it was written.

And so it is with faith. We're imperfect people trying to follow a score written by a perfect God. Sometimes we hit the wrong note, whether it's an earnest mistake or we're lured by a conductor who would abuse our faith in an attempt to sway our actions. Sometimes a whole movement of His symphony is poorly rendered--at least that's what it feels like to me, when I pass through a time of stumbling. And I've stumbled a lot.

In either case, it's not the Composer's fault. And I keep studying His score.

1 Beware of practicing your righteousness before men to be noticed by them; otherwise you have no reward with your Father who is in heaven.
Matthew 6:1 (NASB)

Family of Certainty

Rich, Vaite, and Ryan

Counting Kin

My niece Vaite visited us last week. She's Tahitian and attends university in France. She'd been home to Papeete for the Christmas holidays and planned a week's stopover here on her return trip.

We'd negotiated a schedule so that she could spend time with us, visit my daughter in San Diego, and visit my dad, my sister, and her family in Lake Elsinore through the week. It had been two years since Vaite had come to California and we were all eager to see her.

Then on the ninth I was admitted to the hospital. I texted my dad and my daughter from a gurney in the emergency room: "Please coordinate among yourselves for one of you to pick Vaite up at LAX tomorrow morning." I included her flight information. Only a few minutes later, Elaine replied to tell me that she would greet Vaite at the airport.

This turn of events led me to think about family, and the expectations, rights, and obligations that go along with being family.

First, I never thought to email Vaite and say, "You know, I've gotten sick and I'm in the hospital, so this visit just isn't going to work out. Sorry." Because she's family, I knew she would understand the circumstances and that we'd rearrange her visits with the various households to accommodate my unexpected unavailability.

Second, I trusted that Elaine and my dad would arrange her retrieval from the airport. I didn't ask, "Can one of you pick her up?" I knew, because we're a family, that if I asked them to handle it, one of them would fetch her.

Anthropologists divide family into two categories: There's your family of orientation, the family you're born into, and your family of procreation, traditionally your spouse, children, and later, if you're lucky, grandchildren.

Tahitians construct families behaviorally: Your family consists of  those people who treat you like family, and whom you treat as family. It's a long story, but that's how Vaite came to be my niece: her mother and I, since our meeting in Papeete in 1990, have treated one another as kin.

Last week's events lead me to suggest another kind of family: Your family of certainty. These are the folks whom you depend upon in times of calamity. They're the ones who are always on your side. Your family of certainty will never desert you.

God's family is a family of certainty. When we accept the gift of our salvation, we're assured of membership in His family--a family that endures for eternity.

4 But when the right time came, God sent his Son, born of a woman, subject to the law. 5 God sent Him to buy freedom for us who were slaves to the law, so that He could adopt us as His very own children. 6 And because we are His children, God has sent the Spirit of His Son into our hearts, prompting us to call out, “Abba, Father.” 7 Now you are no longer a slave but God’s own child. And since you are His child, God has made you His heir.
Galatians 4:4-7 (NLT)

Intellectuals for God!

A Big Stack of Books

He Came to Take Away our Sins, not our Brains

I entertained myself yesterday by reading through a catalog from a Christian bookstore. I did a double-take when I read this phrase in the description of a study guide to sharing the gospel:

"Features fascinating on-the-street conversations with atheists, intellectuals, cult members, and others..."

It struck me as an odd grouping to include intellectuals with atheists and cult members. Mentally I hummed the old Sesame Street tune, "One of These is not Like the Others."

Then, intellectual that I am, I looked up the definition of "intellectual." Maybe I've misunderstood the meaning of the word all these years? According to Merriam-Webster's online dictionary, intellectual means:

1a : of or relating to the intellect or its use b : developed or chiefly guided by the intellect rather than by emotion or experience : rational c : requiring use of the intellect

2a : given to study, reflection, and speculation b : engaged in activity requiring the creative use of the intellect

Nothing in the definition led me to understand why an intellectual might be lumped together with an atheist and a cult member. Then I recalled a conversation recently with a young member of our family, whom I optimistically think of as a prodigal from his faith. He explained to my husband and me one evening, in the tone you might adopt with a child whom you suspect is not particularly bright, that "smart people don't believe in God."

At the time, I struggled not to snicker.

Yesterday, after reading that catalog description, I turned to my bible to see what I could find about intelligence and faith. It makes for interesting reading and confirms that we are not to set aside our brains when we follow Christ. On the contrary, we're urged to seek God's wisdom and to apply His gift of intelligence to our walk with Him.

I guess I'll cancel that order for stupid pills.

29 Now God gave Solomon wisdom and very great discernment and breadth of mind, like the sand that is on the seashore. 30 Solomon's wisdom surpassed the wisdom of all the sons of the east and all the wisdom of Egypt.

1 Kings 4:29-30 (NASB)

1 My son, if you will receive my words
And treasure my commandments within you,
2 Make your ear attentive to wisdom,
Incline your heart to understanding;
3 For if you cry for discernment,
Lift your voice for understanding;
4 If you seek her as silver
And search for her as for hidden treasures;
5 Then you will discern the fear of the LORD
And discover the knowledge of God.
6 For the LORD gives wisdom;
From His mouth come knowledge and understanding.
7 He stores up sound wisdom for the upright;
He is a shield to those who walk in integrity,
8 Guarding the paths of justice,
And He preserves the way of His godly ones.
9 Then you will discern righteousness and justice
And equity and every good course.
Proverbs 2:1-9 (NASB)

15 There is gold, and an abundance of jewels;

But the lips of knowledge are a more precious thing.
Proverbs 20:15 (NASB)

17 As for these four youths, God gave them knowledge and intelligence in every branch of literature and wisdom; Daniel even understood all kinds of visions and dreams.

Daniel 1:17 (NASB)

14"For the earth will be filled

With the knowledge of the glory of the LORD,
As the waters cover the sea.
Habakkuk 2:14 (NASB)

18 I pray that your hearts will be flooded with light so that you can understand the confident hope He has given to those He called—His holy people who are His rich and glorious inheritance.
Ephesians 1:18 (NLT)

"We are Wise to Acknowledge Miracles"

Hiker Rescue in our Neighborhood, December 21, 2010

In the News

The past week has delivered news of heart-rending tragedies. It hurts to read the paper when citizens are being shot at neighborhood gatherings and children are being beaten to death. Inevitably, though, stories rise through the reportage of courageous people doing brave things in the face of danger. Sometimes we read of kind people extending grace to others who've been harmed by evil.

Consider the horrific massacre in Tucson on January 8.

Bystanders, including a man who ran from the safety of a store to the scene, disarmed the shooter. A woman wrestled a magazine from his hand as he attempted to reload his weapon.

Doctors treating Representative Gabrielle Giffords, the presumed target of the attack and the most severely injured of the survivors, feel that her rate of recovery surpasses what they can attribute to their skill as doctors. Added one of them, "We are wise to acknowledge miracles."

Meanwhile in Denver, a two-year-old lay dying from a horrible beating. A commercial airline pilot held a flight at LAX so the child's grandfather, in Los Angeles on business, could return to his family before the little boy died. In these days of tight, complex flight schedules at major airports, holding a flight is a very big deal.

God doesn't promise us a way around the valleys of shadows; He does promise to guide us through them. I see His promise fulfilled in my fellow humans' acts of bravery and kindness, and yes, in miracles.

4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I fear no evil, for You are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You have anointed my head with oil;
My cup overflows.
6 Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.
Psalm 23:4-6 (NASB)

Benched!

Opening the Banquet

Other Plans

The past several days were to have been packed with activity. On Thursday, January 6, my husband Rich and I were leaving to attend the United States Coast Guard Auxiliary District 11 (South) annual training conference. We planned to pack on Wednesday evening, depart on Thursday, and leave the conference Sunday morning. That same evening, our niece, Vaite, was to land at LAX. She studies in France but had been home in Papeete for the holidays. She planned to spend a week with us before returning to her university. We worked out a schedule so that she could spend some time with all the family in Southern California: a few days with us, then down to my daughter's home in San Diego, then over to Lake Elsinore to visit my dad and my sister, then back to us for two nights before her departure on January 15.

In addition to our busy personal schedule, big developments were taking place at my work. We'd awarded the bid for a long-planned remodel of our offices and demolition was to begin this week. As operations manager, I've been responsible for several aspects of this major project; I anticipated a challenging and rewarding week as construction began.

It didn't work out that way.

Wednesday evening, January 5, our labrador retriever, JD began vomiting blood. So instead of packing for our conference, we spent the evening at the emergency veterinary clinic. After several tests ruled out any life-threatening conditions, we returned home with the sad pooch about one-thirty in the morning, armed with anti-emetic drugs and a bland diet. So much for packing on Wednesday night. We fell into bed about 2 AM.

No more than an hour later I awakened. My wrist felt as if it was on fire and my chest hurt. I woke Rich and told him what was happening. I asked him to bring me some antacid, as I assumed the pain was heartburn. I was thankful that he was able to go back to sleep after helping me, but I was done sleeping. I soon recognized that the skin problem was hives, so I took an antihistamine.

I worked until 2 PM on Thursday, then raced home to pack for the conference. I was still raising hives, but the chest pain was better. We checked into our hotel in time to attend a reception on Thursday evening. I felt satisfied. Despite the unscheduled trip to the vet's and my hives and strange chest pain, we had made it to the conference. 

Saturday morning the chest pain returned. I slipped out of a meeting. A friend in the Auxiliary summoned the first aid team for our conference, who evaluated me, then called the paramedics.

The paramedics ran an EKG and told me my heart looked normal, but that I should go to the hospital for further evaluation. I declined, as I had duties to fulfill at the conference. I skipped some conference seminars and slept all afternoon on Saturday (as I had on Friday) and discharged my obligations at the banquet on Saturday night. 

At some point over the weekend Vaite had emailed to tell us that her flight had been cancelled and she would arrive Monday morning instead of Sunday evening. When we left the conference on Sunday, we planned to return home, tidy up the house, purchase groceries, and unpack. I sent my boss a message explaining about the change in my niece's travel plans, asking to take an early "lunch" on Monday so I could meet her at the airport.

All this time I'd been growing itchier and itchier, and my chest did not feel good at all. The roll of Tums I'd bought at the hotel gift shop didn't relieve the chest pain. Once home, as Rich and I were planning our next steps to prepare for our houseguest, the chest pain increased. I realized I couldn't swallow.

That's when Rich took me to the emergency room. A staff person ushered me past a waiting room full of people and took my vital signs. A nurse led me into a restroom to change into a hospital gown and I was shown to a gurney in the hallway opposite the nurses' station. A doctor evaluated me. To my surprise, he told me they would admit me for a cardiac evaluation.

I texted my boss, my dad and my daughter, telling them that I was being admitted to the hospital. I sent a separate text to my daughter and my dad, asking them to coordinate for one of them to meet Vaite at the airport the following morning. A nurse injected an antihistamine and a steroid and gave me a "GI cocktail" of foul-tasting stuff to drink. Sometime after midnight, they moved me to a room in the hospital. I urged my worried, exhausted husband to go home and rest.

So much for my busy week, I thought, as I listened to the monitor track my heartbeat. I wouldn't be enjoying my niece's company and coordinating the construction project at work after all.

Two days and several tests later, the doctors sent me home. I'd hoped to return to the office the next day, but the doctors had performed an angiogram and I was to stay home and rest for a few days to recover from that invasive procedure.

My heart is healthy. I followed up with my allergist, who prescribed an aggressive course of antihistamines and antacid medications. [Something I learned: H1 receptors respond to histamine by producing hives and other classic signs of an allergic reaction. H2 receptors respond to histamine by producing excessive stomach acid, leading to reflux symptoms. Pepcid and Zantac, two well-known reflux medications,  are H2 blockers.]

Despite all these changes to our plans, the scheduled events are moving along. Vaite arrived. My daughter met her at the airport; she spent more time with the rest of the family than we had planned. She's having a great time. This afternoon she'll come to spend a day with us before flying back to school tomorrow. The construction job at work is moving along without me.

It's been a good lesson for me. Despite my talents of organization and efficiency, I'm not in charge. I can plan and schedule and arrange to my heart's content, but my plans don't determine what happens. Family and coworkers stepped up to cover things I'd planned to do; kind neighbors offered to help my husband and delivered dinner. My husband brought me flowers. My coworkers sent flowers. Just this moment, another kind neighbor appeared at my door with a warm frittata for my breakfast.

No one rebuked me for being sick when I was needed.

When I prayed for relief, my symptoms intensified. It took me a few days to see it, but the pain was the answer to my prayer. It led me to acknowledge my weakness and seek medical help.

8 Concerning this I implored the Lord three times that it might leave me.
9 And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness " Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. 10 Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.
2 Corinthians 12:8-10 (NASB)

Vital Signs

Spiritual Care

The Heart's Job

Sunday evening I found myself in the emergency room of our local hospital. Rich took me there for assessment of hives that made my skin burn, chest pain, and difficulty swallowing. I prepared for a long night, as the waiting room was full.

Apparently chest pain is a free pass to the head of the line, as I was taken to the treatment area immediately. Several hours later I was being wheeled upstairs to a room: the doctor supervising my care felt that a cardiac workup was in order to rule out the possibility that I'd had a heart attack.

Once I was settled in my bed, I took stock of my surroundings. On the wall opposite my bed, I saw a whiteboard. On it was written the date, my nurse's name, my room number, and a list of tests to be done that day.

I spent two days in the hospital. At each shift change, my nurse would update the board, adding the nurse's name, changing the date, and modifying the list of procedures scheduled for that day.

I was struck by the entry on the line labeled "Spiritual Care." It read, "Heart monitor vital signs" and that phrase remained on the board for the duration of my stay.

To amuse myself, I mentally punctuated that phrase, trying to transform it into a sentence. I tried a number of possibilities and finally settled on:

Heart: monitor [for] vital signs!

I went to my bible to see what scripture I could find about the human heart and the vitality that resides there.

Here are my favorites:

2 Put me on trial, Lord, and cross-examine me.

Test my motives and my heart.
3 For I am always aware of Your unfailing love,
and I have lived according to Your truth.
Psalm 26:2-3 (NLT)

9 “And Solomon, my son, learn to know the God of your ancestors intimately. Worship and serve Him with your whole heart and a willing mind. For the Lord sees every heart and knows every plan and thought. If you seek Him, you will find Him. But if you forsake Him, He will reject you forever."
1 Chronicles 28:9 (NLT)

23 Guard your heart above all else,

for it determines the course of your life.
Proverbs 4:23 (NLT)

15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful.

16 Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God.
17 Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.
Colossians 3:15-17 (NASB)

13 A glad heart makes a happy face;

a broken heart crushes the spirit.
14 A wise person is hungry for knowledge,
while the fool feeds on trash.
15 For the despondent, every day brings trouble;
for the happy heart, life is a continual feast.
Proverbs 15:13-15 (NLT)

10 Create in me a clean heart, O God,

And renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Psalm 51:10 (NASB)

11 Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end.
Ecclesiastes 3:11 (NLT)

Wealth or Love?

 

Where we Gather

Who do I Crowd Out?

In biblical times, a man's wealth might be measured by the size of his herds and flocks.  As a result, the more wealth he accumulated, the more grazing land his livestock required. As people grew richer, they literally distanced themselves from others just to maintain their riches-on-the-hoof.

In today's complex economy, we don't have to move away from our loved ones because we have so many sheep. All the same, I wonder sometimes: would we have more room in our schedule for loved ones if we had less stuff? 

Our home is neither grand nor luxurious. But what if we'd chosen drastically cheaper living arrangements? Would we then choose to work less, and hang out with our family more? Or would we maintain our current income and plow the leftover cash into other stuff?

How many times each day am I called to choose between a path that honors a relationship and a path that leads to stuff? Each decision point reflects a tension that's been with humanity for a long, long, time.

I'm not a particularly acquisitive person. Still, I pray each day for the discernment to pick the relationship path. Always.

After all, even Abraham and his nephew, Lot, didn't consider reducing their herds. They just discussed who would move.

⁵ Lot, who was traveling with Abram, had also become very wealthy with flocks of sheep and goats, herds of cattle, and many tents. 6 But the land could not support both Abram and Lot with all their flocks and herds living so close together. 7 So disputes broke out between the herdsmen of Abram and Lot. (At that time Canaanites and Perizzites were also living in the land.)

8 Finally Abram said to Lot, “Let’s not allow this conflict to come between us or our herdsmen. After all, we are close relatives! 9 The whole countryside is open to you. Take your choice of any section of the land you want, and we will separate. If you want the land to the left, then I’ll take the land on the right. If you prefer the land on the right, then I’ll go to the left.”

Genesis 13:5-9 (NLT)

His Father's Voice

Rob, Sawyer, and Cadence model their new hats. Christmas Day, 2010

Tuning In

New Years' Day brought my daughter, Elaine, her husband, Rob, and our newest grandson, Sawyer, for an afternoon visit.

At seven weeks of age, Sawyer has new tricks to show off each time we see him. As I sat on the sofa, chatting with his parents and Rich, I held him, studying his latest accomplishments and drifting on the peaceful joy that flows when I hold a newborn.

Rob added something to our conversation and Sawyer squirmed in my arms. "He's getting strong!" I exclaimed. Elaine smiled and nodded.

A few minutes later, Rob spoke again, and Sawyer squirmed again--he wriggled to his left. After a third round of Rob-speaks-Sawyer-wiggles-to-his-left, I realized that Sawyer wasn't simply indulging in random baby calisthenics.

No, my brilliant and precocious grandson was turning towards his father's voice.

I'm reasonably certain that he wasn't following the fine points of our discussion. I'm pretty sure the meaning of our words is not yet within his understanding.

But he pays attention to his father's voice. That's remarkable.

Taking my cue from a little baby boy, I've set a goal for myself.

I will attend to my Father's voice. I will rest quietly enough to hear His still, small voice.

11 And He said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the Lord. And, behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake: 12 And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice.
1 Kings 19:11-12 (KJV)

19 This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live 20 and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to His voice, and hold fast to Him. For the Lord is your life, and He will give you many years in the land He swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.
Deuteronomy 30:19-20 (NIV)

Packing up Christmas

Trappings and Treasures
Friday Rich and I visited a local store. Days earlier, displays of gift wrap, tinsel, and ornaments had overwhelmed the store's prime selling space. Now, clerks were busily condensing the remains of their Christmas merchandise onto a few shelves near the back of the store. A sign read, "Christmas! Final Clearance!"

I heard a small boy say to his mother, "Look! They're putting away Christmas!"

It's kind of funny, when you think about it: We spend money--sometimes a lot of money--on the baubles and sparkles to adorn our homes with Christmas decorations. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the trappings that we miss the treasure of Christmas.

And the treasure of Christmas never goes on clearance, because although it's priceless, Someone Else paid the price. For you and me, the treasure of Christmas is free.


Sunday Rich and I put away the trappings of Christmas at our house. Rich carefully packed away the nativity figures; I wrapped tree ornaments in protective paper and nestled them back into their boxes.  We stripped garland from the staircase and removed the stockings from the mantel.

We broke one ornament. It seems that each year, one ornament dives to our hardwood floor and shatters. Trappings can be fragile.

In a few hours, our home had been transformed back into its "usual" state. You couldn't see a sign of Christmas anywhere.

But you could feel it. 
My hope for this year is that the treasures of Christmas will remain palpable to us through all the seasons on the calendar.

That we'll remember, and give thanks, for that precious Baby sent to earth for us even when no china figurine of Jesus graces our living room.

That we'll glow with love and faith without the twinking lights of a Christmas tree.

That we'll remember that the treasure, unlike the trappings, is tough--so tough it can carry us through whatever the new year may bring.

14 Guard, through the Holy Spirit who dwells in us, the treasure which has been entrusted to you.
2 Timothy 1:14 (NASB)

Wealth at our Door...

Murphy and Me: January 1, 2011

...and Blessings at our Table

I've been home this week recovering from abdominal surgery. My husband Rich has cared for me and our home as I recuperate. My daughter Elaine called on Wednesday to inquire how I was doing and if we needed a hand with anything. I was touched that this busy young wife and mother who lives 80 miles away offered to assist us.

"Thanks, but Rich has everything well in hand," I told her. She said she'd be up later in the week to visit.

Yesterday, she, my son-in-law Rob, and newest grandson Sawyer drove from San Diego to spend the afternoon with us. We enjoyed lunch together, then I held my infant grandson for a while, relaxing into his peacefulness. I felt so blessed by this new little life that has come to our family. Not much, I thought to myself, could make this New Year's Day better.

After the kids left, I stretched out on the sofa for a nap. I awoke to quiet voices coming from the kitchen; Rich and his son Ryan were discussing something in low voices. I couldn't hear their words.

Just a few minutes later Rich announced that dinner was nearly ready. I wandered into the kitchen.

"Rich? Why are there four places set at the table?"

"Did I set four places?" he asked. "Don't worry about it. I'll pick up the extra one after dinner." I figured he'd been thinking about four of us enjoying lunch together when he set the table as I picked up the extra plate and flatware and put them away.

Just a moment later I turned as our front door opened. There stood....MURPHY!! I did a double take then rushed to greet him.

Andrew Murphy, one of our three "Navy Boys," joined our family when Ryan was in A-school in San Diego in 2007. Murphy's family was in New Hampshire; Chad Skyberg's, in South Dakota; and Dan Antonides', in Nebraska. We happily provided them with a nearby home base during weekends and holidays while they were in school with Ryan. Murphy had been stationed in Japan once he'd completed school; he'd spent the last three years there.

Facebook had made it easy to keep up with our boys. I knew Murphy had completed his tour of duty in Japan. I knew he'd flown to New Hampshire in December to visit his family over the holidays. I knew he'd bought a car and was driving across the country, and that in January he would begin 10 months of school in San Diego.

I didn't know he was coming to visit on New Year's Day. So this was what Ryan and Rich had been discussing in whispers! I hurried to return the fourth place setting to our table.

After dinner, Murphy and Ryan left to spend the evening in Los Angeles.

I got to thinking. I'd commented on New Year's Eve that 2010 had been so filled with blessings that I couldn't imagine 2011 being better. Yet the very first day of the new year had brought me two special visits with loved ones. And my husband and bonus son had conspired to make Murphy's visit even sweeter by preserving a surprise for me.

I should know better than to believe that I've been as blessed as I can be, that God can't top what He's already done for me.

19 How great is the goodness

You have stored up for those who fear You.
You lavish it on those who come to You for protection,
blessing them before the watching world.

Psalm 31:19 (NLT)