Finding the Way Home

Many Paths, One Destination

My father, a retired telephone engineer, was kind enough to meet me at my office late last Friday afternoon to examine our telephone system and answer some questions about the services we've accumulated over the years.

When we left my office, we headed to my house for dinner. "I'll use my GPS," Dad said, as I prepared to give him directions. Our rural home is a familiar destination for him, but my office is 12 miles away in an unfamiliar part of the city. We parted in the parking lot and joined the parade of weary commuters driving home.

Four different routes, each with dozens of permutations, will lead you from my office to my home. As you get closer, leaving the city behind, fewer options are available, until finally there's only one way to go to reach the destination.


Dad and I set out on different courses. I had spotted him making a right turn as I continued straight through a major intersection a mile from the office. But as I waited at the final major intersection--the last decision point in the route--Dad glided to a stop in the line of cars behind me. By the time we reached the final, four-mile twisting stretch of country road, he was right behind me.
 
Isn't it just like this in our walk with Christ? We may arrive on the route from different starting points, and we may take different turns along the way, as His earthly plans for each of us differ.
 
But when it's time to claim our eternal home, we're all heading in the same direction, following Him.

8 The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life.
I will advise you and watch over you.
9 Do not be like a senseless horse or mule
that needs a bit and bridle to keep it under control.”
Psalm 32:8-9 (NLT)

Just so Thankful

Cadence

Contagious Gratitude

Sunday, we attended an intensive workshop in gratitude: a birthday party for our grandson Cadence, who turns four on Thursday.

The formula was simple:

1. People gave Cadence gifts.

2. Cadence delighted in the gifts.

In true four-year-old style, his excitement could not be dampened. A modest stack of books, $20 in spending money, a Spiderman puzzle, an elaborate T-Rex--each gift was a treasure to him. 

And he wasn't afraid to show it. 

                           ¹⁸ Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who
                     belong to Christ Jesus.
                     1 Thessalonians 5:18

Gift Wrap and Graveyards

His Ways, His Timing

Yesterday we celebrated our daughter-in-law Rachael on her 28th birthday. On our way to the birthday festivities, we stopped at the cemetery nearby to pay our respects at the grave of my husband's firstborn son, Sean. He died on his wife's birthday four years ago.

Thursday brings the second anniversary of my mother's death. I will drive to San Diego to meet my father at the cemetery where her ashes are interred. Later that day, I'll meet my daughter Elaine, son-in-law Rob, and grandson Cadence for dinner. Cadence will be four on Thursday.

My maternal grandmother died on my mother's birthday in 1980. In 2000, my cousin died late on a Sunday night; the coroner notified my aunt on Monday--my daughter's 18th birthday.

It's a strangely bittersweet practice we've had to adopt, grieving our loved ones as we celebrate the birthdays of other loved ones. I think we cry at birthday parties more than most people do.

But the cakes, the singing, the excited children and bright gifts remind us: Even in our darkest moments, we have cause for joy.

We have God.

3 To all who mourn in Israel,

He will give a crown of beauty for ashes,

a joyous blessing instead of mourning,
festive praise instead of despair.
In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks
that the Lord has planted for His own glory.
Isaiah 61:3 (NLT)

The Dog Mob

JD the Lab, Ole Boy Trevor, Rich, and Lil' Doc

Devotion and Dependence

My husband Rich and I frequently have exchanges like this:

Me: The dogs love you!

Rich: I feed them.

However you conceive it, there's no question that our pack is devoted to us. They throw a ticker-tape parade every time we return home. In the evenings, the prime spot is at Rich's feet (or for Doc, in my lap). If we're preparing to leave, they watch for any sign of us retrieving their leashes, the signal that they're coming along. JD occasionally bolts through the front door even if we haven't leashed him. The sound of Rich gathering stainless bowls brings an excited stampede into the kitchen to see if it's time to eat. Doc submits calmly when Rich clips his hair. Usually, they obey our commands.

I am reasonably certain that any of the three would fight valiantly, even to the death, to protect us.

In short, our dogs model for us a great approach to our relationship with God:

• They want always to be close to us.
• They will follow us anywhere.
• They'll chase after us.
• They depend on us to meet all their needs.
• They trust us completely.
• They're obedient.
• They would rather die than see us attacked.

Next time I'm feeling bogged down or confused by the complexity and mystery of my faith, I'm going to take a cue from my dogs, chase after God, and sit at His feet.

 16 So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive His mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.     Hebrews 4:16 (NLT)

Family Resemblances, Part Two

Family and Friends Celebrate Rich's 50th Birthday

April, 2009

Not Done Yet!

Yesterday I received a heartening message from my dear friend, whom I'll call Grace.  She's been facing some painful changes in her life and we've been talking on the phone now and then, as well as exchanging email messages. Helpful context: Grace subscribes to Godspotting and receives each post via email. The challenge she faces now rises from a person who's important in her life who has turned to paganism.

Here's what she wrote:

"First, thanks for listening to me rant last week (well, almost 2 weeks now). After a great weekend with friends, I am feeling much better. Two of my friends are pagan and had some great insight for me. Paganism has something resembling the "Do Unto Others" commandment. It's the Rule of Three or the Threefold Rule.

But the larger reason for this email is this Godspotting post. I'm traveling and I saw this come through during my drive from [my hometown] to catch a flight [at the airport]. I kept it on my Blackberry so I could read it when I got to my gate; which I did.

I enjoyed the message very much. I'm much like your friend in my spirituality. I believe in a higher power of some sort, but am very open to what that higher power might be. This message was one I really needed to hear right now. :-)

So, I read it and deleted it. I hesitated on the choice of deleting it completely or just deleting it from my Blackberry. I chose to delete it completely since I know I can look at your Blog anytime and find previous stories.

Done, right? Well, not exactly. After I clicked delete and confirmed the deletion, the little red light on my Blackberry was blinking again. Sheesh, I thought as I navigated back to my inbox. I expected to see another email or a text, but I did not. It was this same email from you [from Feedburner, actually]. Apparently I'm not as done with this message [as I thought I was].
Grace"

I feel so blessed when friends share with me that a post I've been led to write here has affected them.

I went searching for an illustrative passage for this post and came upon Psalm 119. The entire psalm speaks so clearly to Grace's situation that I invite you to read it now.

145 I cried with all my heart; answer me, O LORD!
I will observe Your statutes.
146 I cried to You; save me
And I shall keep Your testimonies.
147 I rise before dawn and cry for help;
I wait for Your words.
148 My eyes anticipate the night watches,
That I may meditate on Your word.
149 Hear my voice according to Your lovingkindness;
Revive me, O LORD, according to Your ordinances.
150 Those who follow after wickedness draw near;
They are far from Your law.
151You are near, O LORD,
And all Your commandments are truth.
152 Of old I have known from Your testimonies
That You have founded them forever.
Psalm 119:145-152 (NASB)

Family Resemblances

My Tahitian Sister, Kay, Buying Produce

Papeete Marketplace, January 2004

Image Bearers

Ever have a "duh!" moment--one of those moments where you realized an insight that was so basic, so obvious, that you felt really stupid that you'd never made that mental connection before?

Me too. Take for example my contemplation of my dear friend Kate. She's the friend everyone longs to have. Once when I was overtaken by a family medical emergency two days before an important business trip, she did my laundry for me. When my previous marriage collapsed, she sheltered me--and spoke the truth in love, holding me accountable for my transgressions. A busy entrepreneur, she always makes time for a heart-to-heart talk. She loves my entire family. Everyone needs a friend like Kate.

She sounds godly, doesn't she?

So here's what I was reflecting on, a week or so ago: Kate doesn't follow the Lord. She's told me that she wishes she could have my faith. We talk about it now and then. And I so want her with me for eternity. I pray for her.

I was stuck on this apparent contradiction. My best friend, who so reflects God's love, doesn't accept Him.

Then the obvious thought came to me: We're all made in His image, whether we choose to accept Him or not.

Duh!

26 Then God said, “Let Us make human beings in Our image, to be like Us. They will reign over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky, the livestock, all the wild animals on the earth, and the small animals that scurry along the ground.” 27 So God created human beings in His own image. In the image of God He created them; male and female He created them. 28 Then God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth and govern it. Reign over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky, and all the animals that scurry along the ground.” 29 Then God said, "Look! I have given you every seed-bearing plant throughout the earth and all the fruit trees for your food. 30 And I have given every green plant as food for all the wild animals, the birds in the sky, and the small animals that scurry along the ground—everything that has life.” And that is what happened. 31 Then God looked over all He had made, and He saw that it was very good! And evening passed and morning came, marking the sixth day.

Genesis 1:26-31 (NLT)

 

Now Hear This!

The Newsboys: "He Reigns"

Meant to be Shared

I heard this song on the radio last night, as I was driving home from an exceptionally long day.

This morning, as I sat down to reflect on what to write today, I noticed that last night I'd jotted "Newsboys--He Reings" [sic--I did mention it was a long day, didn't I?] on a pad next to my computer. I decided to look for a video to share with you.

I surfed over to YouTube and began to type in the track name. As soon as I'd typed in "newsboy" a list of possible matches came up, including several different song titles.

But the cursor was highlighting a specific song, about halfway down the list of suggestions.

Yup. "He Reigns."

Next I went to BibleGateway.com, and used the keyword search to find an illustrative verse. I wanted the "joyful noise" reference. BibleGateway showed me Psalm 100, verses 1 and 2. As is my habit, once I'd located that verse, I switched to the passage lookup function and entered a "bigger chunk" of scripture so I could see the context of the verse. I entered Psalm 100:1-5.

Usually one has the option, when viewing results, to click a link and read the entire chapter. No such option was offered for my selection. Puzzled, I turned to my bible to look up Psalm 100 so I could read the rest of the psalm.

It's only five verses long.

I began to share this song with you because it's inspiring. But now I'm feeling inspired to share it.

1 Shout with joy to the Lord, all the earth!
2 Worship the Lord with gladness.
Come before Him, singing with joy.
3 Acknowledge that the Lord is God!
He made us, and we are His.
We are His people, the sheep of His pasture.
4 Enter His gates with thanksgiving;
go into His courts with praise.
Give thanks to Him and praise His name.
5 For the Lord is good.
His unfailing love continues forever,
and His faithfulness continues to each generation.
Psalm 100 (NLT)

Divine Appointments

Elizabeth and John

God Keeps the Calendar

I've written before about our dear friend Elizabeth and her son John. Recently she announced that they would be relocating to her country of birth. Thrilled to learn they'd be passing through Southern California on their voyage, Rich and I  invited them to stay with us.

Elizabeth and John have many friends here, so I couldn't monopolize their time. She said they'd like to visit us on Sunday and Monday and I eagerly agreed. We planned to pick them up from another friend's house after the 11:15 service at church on Sunday. We usually attend at 9:00, but we wanted them to have the morning with their friends before we came to collect them.

Saturday evening she texted me to say that they wouldn't be ready to leave the friend's home until 3 o'clock, as her friend's mother was coming for lunch. I was disappointed. Rich wanted to take John on a hike. We'd bought a stepping-stone kit so we could capture John's little handprint before he moved away. And I wanted a long visit with Elizabeth while Rich and John were off doing manly outdoorsy things. I'm afraid my first response to her revealed my unhappiness at the change in plans.

As I thought about it I felt ashamed. I understood that they were moving far, far away and several people wanted a visit before they left. We agreed that we'd see them at 3 and I apologized for my earlier tone.

Rich and I decided to attend the 11:15 service all the same, so we could attend to some preparations at home before going to church that morning.

At the end of the service, Pastor Rick announced that he would be baptizing people after the service. Rich and I exchanged looks. We serve in the baptism ministry. Our church has dozens of pastors and one is scheduled to perform baptisms after every service, but many people prefer to be baptized by Pastor Rick, as they know him.

Due to the congregation's fondness for him, usually when he baptizes people it's well-marked on the baptism ministry sign-up sheet so extra hands can be made available to assist with the process. The schedule for Sunday had no special notation--this was a surprise!

After service we hurried to the baptismal. We found the two scheduled ministry members, the staff person who leads our ministry, and another "walk-on" volunteer like us. The line of people presenting themselves to be baptized was about seven times its usual length on a Sunday morning. Side by side, we all served together to assist in the process.

We were only there about 30 minutes, but that was enough time to get all the people registered for baptism.

If Elizabeth and John had been waiting for us, I would have been reluctant to stay and serve.

It always works out best when God keeps the calendar.

33 Teach me Your decrees, O Lord;

I will keep them to the end.

34 Give me understanding and I will obey Your instructions;
I will put them into practice with all my heart.
35 Make me walk along the path of Your commands,
for that is where my happiness is found.
Psalm 119:33-35 (NLT)

What God has Joined Together....

Elaine, Rob, and Judi

...Is Sometimes more than Two!

My dad said to me, the other day, "Elaine's [my daughter] marriage to Rob has been good for the whole family." I didn't ask him what he meant, because it seemed obvious to me. Rob and his family are awesome.

He has a younger brother, Ricky, who lives in Los Angeles; baby sister Crissy lives in Florida, where her husband Joe serves in the Coast Guard. His grandfather, Buck, is a godly, gentle man. We've developed important friendships with all of them.

But Rob's mom, Judi, has been a special gift to me. She has a huge heart. She adores my daughter and grandson, Cadence. She welcomed Rich and me as family the first time we met (a year ago, at Cadence's birthday party). I knew right away that this woman would become my friend.

Preparing for weddings--and in-law-hood--can be tense. We just had fun. She and I took Elaine shopping for her gown, followed by a ladies' lunch. We had a blast. We laughed, and we cried, and we rejoiced in the love our children had found together. The weekend of the kids' wedding, Rich and I worshiped with her and her family at their church. It felt like home.

Now, we email one another with news, funny stories, and prayer requests. Last month she drove 80 miles early on a Sunday to worship with us. After church we came home and she taught me how me to prepare one of Rich's favorite dishes. After brunch, her dad met us at the marina and we took them out for a cruise. Next month, we're taking a pilgrimage together that I'm sure you'll read about here.

I've written before about how Judi and I discovered that we'd both been praying for someone special for our children. I'm pretty sure neither of us was expecting the other as part of the bargain...but I'm sure glad it worked out that way.

It troubles me that we have no kinship term that describes two mothers whose children are married. I can call her "my daughter's mother-in-law" or "my son-in-law's mother," but neither of those terms indicates any direct relationship between us.

So I've taken to calling her my co-grandma.

When God sets out to build a family, expect amazing results!

17 Every good and perfect gift comes down from the Father who created all the lights in the heavens. He is always the same and never makes dark shadows by changing. 18 He wanted us to be His own special people, and so He sent the true message to give us new birth.
James 1:17-18 (CEV)

Lumpy Batter

Accepting Grace

Good muffins come from lumpy batter. As a beginning baker, I struggled with this truth. I wanted to mix the flour, the sugar, the eggs, the milk--everything--until the batter was silken and beautiful.

But perfect batter makes for crummy muffins. Instead, I had to learn to stir everything together just until all the ingredients were mixed and moistened, but still full of lumps. Overmixing toughens muffins.

Muffin batter is a good life lesson.

Sometimes I think we toughen ourselves by overmixing--expecting perfection even in cases where an adequate job is good enough.

As a young woman I nearly burned a turkey once because I was busy setting an exquisite holiday table. I'm pretty sure my family came that day to share time and a good meal, not to be impressed by my elaborate tablescape.

I remind myself to focus my efforts on those tasks and circumstances that call for my very best....and to let go of the rest when it's good enough.

I'm learning to accept God's grace. It calls for daily practice, but I'm learning.

9 For God saved us and called us to live a holy life. He did this, not because we deserved it, but because that was His plan from before the beginning of time—to show us His grace through Christ Jesus.

2 Timothy 1:9 (NLT)

Sailing Away

March, 2010: Aboard our Boat

Profound Grief, Profound Faith

Saturday Rich and I attended a memorial service and committal at sea for our friend Clay. His wife and my husband have worked together for 24 years. Clay fought cancer for a year and a half before being called home on August 23. He was 50 years old.

The church service was beautiful. Clay sang with the Oceanaires, a men's a capella chorus, for many years; friends from that group sang during the memorial. One of his sisters sang; another spoke of the family's steadfast faith and how God had carried them through Clay's illness.

Following a reception at the church, we drove to San Pedro and boarded the Exy Johnson for the committal. Clay and his wife had met as volunteers sailing tall ships; friends made up the crew on Saturday night. It was good to be among people who loved him for this final boat ride together. After Clay's wife, dad and sisters had scattered his ashes, we ate and we sang. Everyone agreed that it was exactly the send off that Clay would have wanted.

Mindful of the special pain that accompanies losing a child, I approached Clay's father, Tom, on the dock after we'd returned to port. I offered a hug and asked, "How are you?" I steeled myself, preparing for tears.

This godly man's face was overtaken by a luminous smile. "This has been a wonderful day," he said.

1 For we know that when this earthly tent we live in is taken down (that is, when we die and leave this earthly body), we will have a house in heaven, an eternal body made for us by God Himself and not by human hands. 2 We grow weary in our present bodies, and we long to put on our heavenly bodies like new clothing. 3 For we will put on heavenly bodies; we will not be spirits without bodies. 4 While we live in these earthly bodies, we groan and sigh, but it’s not that we want to die and get rid of these bodies that clothe us. Rather, we want to put on our new bodies so that these dying bodies will be swallowed up by life. 5 God Himself has prepared us for this, and as a guarantee He has given us His Holy Spirit.

2 Corinthians 5:1-5 (NLT)

Out on A Limb

 Tall Eucalyptus with Brittle Branches

Why Birds have Wings, and We Don't

Last week I watched as a crow lit on a branch high in this tree, outside my office. The limb gave way under the bird's weight.

The crow rode down about fifty feet, still perched on the falling branch. No more than ten feet from the ground, the bird flapped its wings and took flight, avoiding a painful, or perhaps fatal, collision.

Have you ever had a moment in life when you felt like you were clinging to a falling limb? I have. 

Lacking wings, I call on God. While at times it's seemed that the ground was coming up fast, He's never yet allowed me to hurtle to the earth.

He teaches us in infinite ways to trust in Him, to depend on Him. He can even use a brittle old branch and a noisy bird to remind us of our need for Him.

Crow in Tree

28 Do you not know? Have you not heard?
The Everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth
Does not become weary or tired
His understanding is inscrutable.
29 He gives strength to the weary,
And to him who lacks might He increases power.
30 Though youths grow weary and tired,
And vigorous young men stumble badly,
31 Yet those who wait for the Lord
Will gain new strength;
They will mount up with wings like eagles,
They will run and not get tired,
They will walk and not become weary.
Isaiah 40:28-31 (NASB)

Late Bloomers

Our Wedding Day:

Kevin, Rachael, Cadence, Elaine, Jeffrey, me, Phil, Rich, Ayden, Ryan, Jordynne, Rebecca, Jeff

A Full Three Years!

Three years ago today Rich and I exchanged marriage vows. Life has brought us quite a collection of milestones in the past 36 months:

October, 2007

   A dear family friend dies

   We're evacuated from our home for 9 days due to the Santiago Fire

March, 2008

   I undergo surgery on my right hand

   My mother falls ill

June, 2008

   My mother's illness is diagnosed as ovarian cancer

   My aunt Dorothy dies

July, 2008

   Granddaughter Carly is born

   Ryan moves out of our home

September, 2008

   My mother dies

October, 2008

   We adopt Doc to be my comfort dog

November, 2008

   My dad moves back to Southern California

May, 2009

   Rich's aunt Mary dies

June, 2009

   I begin this blog

August, 2009

   Rebecca moves into our home

December, 2009

   I undergo surgery on my left hand

February, 2010

   Elaine becomes engaged to Rob

March, 2010

   Our great-niece Kaitlyn is born

May, 2010

   Elaine and Rob marry

June, 2010

   Rebecca moves out of our home

   Rebecca becomes engaged to Jeff

July, 2010

   We reconnect with my long-lost cousin Marlaina

August, 2010

   Three dear friends die

In between these momentous events, we've celebrated holidays and spent weekends with our grandchildren.

We've painted the bedroom, sat on our deck enjoying coffee and one another, shopped for groceries, argued, cried, laughed, prayed. We've attended weddings and workshops, funerals and fundraisers.

We've loved. God has been very, very good to us.

4 Since everything God created is good, we should not reject any of it but receive it with thanks. 5 For we know it is made acceptable by the word of God and prayer.
1 Timothy 4:4-5 (NLT)